You Have Died of Dysentery - Long Sleeve T-Shirt office Red cursive text reads "Willow

Red cursive text reads "Willow Lounge" on either side

depicting a figure holding a bottle

Banjo music echoing across a river sounds charming for exactly four seconds before decades of cinematic trauma kick in

Graduation requirements include surviving long enough to earn your vengeance

Red block letters on a black background read "BOWL" below

You Have Died of Dysentery - Long Sleeve T-Shirt office Red cursive text reads "WillowOregon Trail taught an entire generation that manifest destiny ends not with a bang but with violent diarrhea, announced in the same calm green font as a math quiz. Every elder millennial's real history education fits on a floppy disk and a tombstone. The Details: Green monochrome pixel art depicts an ox hitched to a covered wagon, rendered in blocky 8 bit style mimicking an Apple II green phosphor display. A bordered rectangle below contains